{"id":11289,"date":"2015-08-23T17:22:40","date_gmt":"2015-08-23T11:52:40","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.officechai.com\/?p=11289"},"modified":"2016-04-27T14:12:47","modified_gmt":"2016-04-27T08:42:47","slug":"things-i-wish-i-could-say-to-my-manager-but-cant","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/officechai.com\/office-humour\/things-i-wish-i-could-say-to-my-manager-but-cant\/","title":{"rendered":"10 Things I wish I Could Say To My Boss, But Probably Won’t"},"content":{"rendered":"

No, I’m not about to actually say these to him anytime soon, but god knows how I’ve felt the urge to say them.<\/span><\/p>\n

I don’t think I’m the only person who’s spent many an exasperated moment wanting to say a few things to our bosses, but simply can’t. Either you value the job too much to risk losing it, or just in deference to seniority, how we do react to the boss is not always how we feel. So, here’s some things I want to say to my boss, even if he’s mostly not going to read it. Some boss, somewhere, might.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

1. You\u2019re not always right<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0
\n<\/a> \"right\"<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

I know conventional rules of hierarchy dictate that we consider the word of our superiors as the holy grail of absolute truth, but it\u2019s possible that you don\u2019t know exactly how my job works. Maybe you\u2019re an excellent marketing guy, but you still don\u2019t know how exactly coding works. So, if I tell you facts about my work, please know that I probably know what you don\u2019t and we both are looking at what\u2019s the best for the business. It\u2019s also completely ok for you to admit that you don’t know something, and I\u2019d be happy to explain. Hierarchy doesn\u2019t have to limit interpersonal learning.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

2. Just because you\u2019re my boss, doesn\u2019t mean I can\u2019t judge YOUR performance<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\"12<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

Funnily, rules of feedback and performance appraisal only work top down in organizations. However the truth is that I\u2019m secretly judging your performance as well. Maybe I didn\u2019t do as well as I could have, but I noticed you haven\u2019t exactly set things on fire either. I also did notice, your lack the other day to submit a report to YOUR boss. Heard of “Lead by example”?
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

3. You really don\u2019t have to use jargon with me<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

\"corporate<\/a>
\n<\/a>I know you\u2019d like to come across as professional, and more informed and so you resort to using terms like \u201cLet\u2019s draw synergies from our collective action by syndicating variables on this component\u201d. But seriously, if you want work done faster, you can just say it in functional terms and I won’t respect you any less. The MBA\u2019s got you this far, talking the language of your audience will take you further.<\/span><\/p>\n

4. Let\u2019s not pretend to have a \u201chigher purpose\u201d<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

You\u2019ve tried to motivate me in terms of the \u201cbigger purpose\u201d we\u2019re achieving, and touching lives with our action etc. Let\u2019s face it. Both you and I are in this job for the money and propogating our self interest. I\u2019m likely to be more motivated to do well, if I\u2019m getting a hike and a promotion, than if my performance is helping me \u201creach my true potential\u201d or helping “change the world” (It’s not) And honestly the better the employees work whatever their motivation is, the better it’s going to be for the company.<\/span><\/p>\n

5. You\u2019re not helping my career.<\/b> It\u2019s a part of your job.<\/b>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\"for<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

In many of our discussions, you talk about exploring my future plans, and how the company can help me fulfill those because I\u2019m supposed to believe that it\u2019s the company\u2019s responsibility to help develop myself and my career. Honestly, I don\u2019t see myself in the company for another 5 years and ideally I want to work at Google<\/a><\/span>. Can you help me get there? No. So, let\u2019s not talk about *my* career development like it\u2019s a service to me, but rather a meticulous plan to get me to commit to this company further.<\/span><\/p>\n

6.\u00a0<\/span><\/span>A personal rapport doesn\u2019t hurt<\/b><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

\"AgonyAunt\"<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

I sent you a \u201cMy dog is getting an operation\u201d text the other day. It was my birthday the last week. I know you have a 100 meetings to attend and some high profile work to finish, but a little personal rapport doesn’t hurt. It makes me less intimidated by you, and relate with you a little more. Of course, don\u2019t hug me at every opportunity or ask me when my next period is, but small things like \u201cHow\u2019s your dog now?\u201d or a joke about wanting the cake from birthday is a-okay. If I want to take a day off because this<\/a><\/span>, please understand that a job is supposed to enable me to have a better life, not replace one.<\/span><\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

7. I really do work better from home<\/b>.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\"Pet\"<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

Let’s face it, the only reason I come to work, is to meet you, and tick the checkbox of being in the office. Unless you’re Google and your office looks like this<\/a><\/span>, I\u2019m actually more productive at home, and my job doesn\u2019t necessitate me to come to work. I wish it was the output, and not the method of inputs that was considered. \u00a0And when you don\u2019t turn up, I\u2019d ideally like to also not.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

8. Don\u2019t apologise for cancelling on that meeting.<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0Honestly I wasn\u2019t looking forward to it and I was quite happy it got canceled.<\/span><\/p>\n

9. Want to give me more work? Think of me for for more rewards.<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

\"awSoSad\"<\/a><\/p>\n

So I’m the go-to person for working on that last minute report to the client for the super important pitch. \u00a0Or suddenly, I’m also a star coder for the critical project for the company. But how come I was passed for the promotion<\/a><\/span>, right after? \u00a0Surely, the more-deserving colleague who was not approached to take on the report or the coding project would’ve been happy with the additional responsibility.<\/span><\/p>\n

Or how about that business trip abroad that I was conveniently forgotten for? Hello! *flashes passport*<\/span><\/p>\n

10. You want to change the world? Be the most innovative company? Start with yourself<\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

You’ve been spinning the same old managerial spiel managers from the 1990s have spun. (Exhibit A in point 3.) You’ve been denying for eg. work from homes on the pretext of “But there’s no such policy” and you have been doing business the same way probably as East India company did. (Employees don’t get stock, unless you’re a CXO, get your own food, take care of your own transport)<\/span><\/p>\n

If the company insists on doing things the way they’ve always been done, and sticking to the protocol, how do you expect your employees can do any better? Apple and Google ain’t great companies just because iPhones and Search are the best products, but because they dared to do the business differently, treat their employees not like work-factories, but as people with a stake in the business. You want great work, don’t expect it because the employee has<\/em> to, \u00a0but because she wants<\/em> to.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

No, I’m not about to actually say these to him anytime soon, but god knows how I’ve felt the urge to say them.<\/p>\n

I don’t think I’m the only person who’s spent many an exasperated moment wanting to say a few things to our bosses, but simply can’t. Either you value the job too much to risk losing it, or just in deference to seniority, how we do react to the boss is not always how we feel. So, here’s some things I want to say to my boss, even if he’s mostly not going to read it. Some boss, somewhere, might.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":25,"featured_media":11449,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[14,46],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-11289","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-office-humour","category-stories"],"yoast_head":"\n10 Things I wish I Could Say To My Boss, But Probably Won't<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/officechai.com\/office-humour\/things-i-wish-i-could-say-to-my-manager-but-cant\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"10 Things I wish I Could Say To My Boss, But Probably Won't\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"No, I'm not about to actually say these to him anytime soon, but god knows how I've felt the urge to say them. 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